Drama Mama goes to the library

Drama, drama. It follows me, I follow it. Here's a fine example.

It's a leisurely day at the library, only I can't seem to make my library card work when I'm logging Dimples onto the computers. Here's what went down that fine day:

Drama Mama: "Library Lady, why doesn't my stinkin' card work? (really, I just asked her what was wrong-really!)".
Library Lady: "Oh" she says politely, "You have a fine of $28 for a damaged book".
Drama Mama: "WHAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!!" I say like a volcano erupting. Okay, so not really erupting, but in my head I could clearly imagine my head popping off at any moment. This eruption is followed by a lot of gasps, "no ways!" and then finally, "I need to see that book"....
Library Lady: "You can get more information at the circulation desk".
Drama Mama(now at the Circ. desk) : "Library Lady, it says in the computer that I have a large fine, I didn't do it, I didn't do it, and I need to see that book now!!!!" Okay, the "didn't do it" part is still in my head at this point but it really, really wants to come out of my mouth, cause I did not, for sure, damage any book!
Library Lady #2 : "Let me go see if I can find it". Library Lady #2 returns with said book and it is indeed damaged. She hands it over to me.
Drama Mama: I look at the book in horror. "No, I did not do this!", "How could this happen? It sat on my shelf, I never even read this!" "How do you know it's my fault?" "Do your guys even check them before they're put back on the shelf?".
Library Lady #2: "Yes, they're pretty thorough, this book looks like it sat in water for a while".
Drama Mama (in my head): Did she just accuse ME of letting a book sit in water like some kind of crazy fool who lets books sit in water??!!! Wahhh! I'm going to get her!!!! "We'll, I refuse to pay for something I did not do!". "I will not pay for it, I will not be checking out books today, and I'm never coming to the library again!!!!!". (Alright, I just said I'm not paying for it and left).
Dimples: "Mom, what about my Thomas books?"
Drama Mama: "Baby, the library said I ruined a book and they said I need to pay for it before I check out any more books. But I didn't do it, and we can't check out books today. I'm so sorry".
Drama Mama: (then to make more drama in the library hall, I call Manly on the cell) : "Manly Man, blah, blah, she accused me of damaging the book, blah, blah, I'm never going to the library again, NEVER!!!!!"
Dimples: "Library books?"
Drama Mama: "Sorry Baby, really sorry".
Drama Mama: (In the car now, driving). "I can't believe that they said I left a book in the water and ruined it, blah, blah, blah". Just then, my life flashed in slow motion before my eyes, "OH---- MY---- GOSH"....... and it hits me like a soccer ball, a HUGE soccer ball to my dramatized head.
Drama Mama: Like a vision of sugar plum fairies in my head, (but they would be really, ugly rotten fairies) I remembered a sultry, summer day. When was that again?. Oh yes, several weeks ago. I had taken the boys to soccer practice. I packed uniforms, treats, toys for squeaky, water, lots of water and........the book. Blasted, cursed library book! Then I remember water, lots of water leaking all over. And me saying, "Ugh, gross!" and tossing the vile, water-logged library book on the shelf where it sat all wet and lonely. Oh, why me!? I killed the book! I'm a vile, killer of books! Woe is me! I did it! I did it! And on top of that I made my baby cry. Please Mother Earth, open up and swallow me and my all of my drama!

And so, a few days later, Drama Mama tip toes back to the Library, pays the fine and checks out as many Thomas the Tank engine books she can find. THE END.