Ma'am I think we have a problem here with your vents.....

Okay, so when I started this blog I had never intended there to be so much talk about bodily functions. But alas, when you have children, so much of your life now revolves around much pee-pee and poo-poo talk. I will try to make this the last entry of this sort for a while so as not to be accused of running a "Blog of Bodily Functions". I feel strongly though that this story must be told. This story is about Dimpled Child. Dear Dimpled Child. He has a fascination with relieving himself whenever and wherever he pleases. How do I know this? Well, it all goes back to the atrocious stink in the bathroom. After much scrubbing, washing and much threatenings about the virtues of hitting the potty instead of the trash can when you piddle, the bathroom still captured the stench of a port-a-potty in 100 degree weather. I did all I could, but after about a month, the mysterious stench still remained. As I was cleaning out Dimpled Child's room one day, I noticed a familiar subway-station smell in the corner by the heating vent (and this happens to be a vent that is shared with the bathroom). You know where I'm going with this right? The bathroom stinks not because of the lack of aiming skills, but because the bathroom shares a vent with Dimpled Child's room; where for some reason he has chosen to piddle in the corner---repeatedly. When I confronted Dimpled Child about the stinky corner in his room at first he denied the deed, then he smiled, barely concealing his secret delight of having his own personal potty next to his bed. I usually have a lot to say as a Mom, I usually freak-out and way overreact when the kids do something so bone-headed, but this time, I had no words at all. I eventually cleaned it and scolded and went on with life. But the story does not end there. In the fall we decided to have all the heating vents cleaned and sanitzed. The cleaning guy went about his work, until of course he got to Dimpled Child's room. Now at this point, I could tell you what the guy said when he got to Dimpled Child's vent, but you've probably guessed it already. It appears that I needed to correct myself when I said that Dimpled Child had "a" potty in his room; apparently he had two.